Why did the iceage end?

Forgot to mention this on the summary. Took the kids to the natural history museum whilst in Budapest. They have a fab super space age life - check out the link its the right hand lift, apparently cost in excess of 100k. Fab fab fab!

We decided to check out the Ice Age exhibition. My dad was with us, he had just about recovered after the lift (he suffers with vertigo) when he was confronted with dozens of stuffed animals! The boy ran round like he had been given two cans of redbull and basically made it his mission to touch all the exhibits. Cue the numerous tellings off from the attendants. At one stage he demolished a small stand but luckily noone noticed. Why did the ice age end? Probably because of the boy!

New Phrases

Boy learned a new phrase today. Pile on. Me the poor hapless victim. I am covered in bruises. He has also started calling Goats Cheese Ghost Cheese. MLP loves smoked cheese, she is addicted to it. The stronger the better.

On why my Granny did not want a fuss

We told my Granny that we had organised a big family / friends gathering for her birthday. She looked appalled. She told me to cancel it. After half hour of coaxing I found out why she was so utterly mortified. She has basically "under reported" her age. By a few years. And all now know. Poor Granny. She does not look any of her 21 years!

Quick Summary

Ok, had a great four days in Hungary. Kids were force fed grannies cakes all weekend and were spoiled rotten. They had a raucus time with the cats, the boy would kick then, MLP would then go and squeeze and twist their ears, the cats, to their credit only scratched once. I bet they were so glad to see the back of us.

We went down to Rackeve, and checked out the renovations to our summerhouse. All is lovely with the exception of a minor detail (a wall where I did not want one) but as its a job for the mightly sledge hammer (at times theraputic!) I am not going to whine!

I would like to unreservidly apologise to the staff and passengers sitting near us on our homebound flight. The kids were mental to say the least. I will offer free earplugs next time. Apologies again.

Since I have been back not much apart from sickness has happened. Oh yes, MLP has an appointment with the Doctor tomm, as at 17 months she is still not walking. A friend of mine checked her over and apart from a stiff ankle found very little else. If GP will ok it then I am going to take her to a chiropractor. Hopefully they will tell me she is suffering from extreme laziness and that will be the end of it. Dear lord, will she walk before she goes to school? Please?

Today I have made Cribo cards with the boy. He loved it. More so than the playdough or painting or stamping (our hallway is covered in red ink in the shape of santa).

Err, thats it.

A long long list for hubby

I will be away for four days with the kids. Hubby has plans to have a boys weekend watching bond movies and doing boy things. Not sure what that is. Someone enlighten me. Or perhaps not. He may be looking forward to a long lie in but thats before he sees the list as long as an orangutangs arm, stretching before him like route 66. There are some ok-ish chores in there and there are some downright rotters thrown in for good measure. His choice what order he does them in but he needs to get it all done by the time i get back. I have been telling him to think of it as Indiana Jones meets the Crystal Maze.

Lost lost lost

I have lost my driving license. Not such a biggie if I were not going to Hungary in two days time. And also wanting to get out and about. Have to console myself with ringing up Mr Seven Seater and getting him to drive us around. He flirted with my granny last time, so thats half my worries sorted.

Better the devil you know

Ok, so have been thinking of getting rid of dark angel, getting him a one way ticket to Siberia etc. I am seriously thinking about going to get a nice Bhuddist person in or someone similar who can tell me what I can do. However, what if I get rid of dark angel and get light satan, or worse still, dark satan with ax extra dash of fire? What to do? Answers on a postcard please!

how to be a sick mum

Firsly, dont even think about being ill. Its not allowed. Then, if you actually have the audacity to be ill then dont think you will be given light duties or bed rest. After putting your kids in a safe place (their cot), go throw up, then carry on as normal, only leaving a five minute grace period for explanations to kids.

If you actually are sick, remember, your husband will be sicker to the power of three. You will need to take him pen and paper for his will. In the meantime, you will have to carry on as per normal.

Start early

The boy normally collects the post. This week it has evolved into opening and processing the post. By processing I mean throwing straight in the bin. With one exception. Today he decided that the Bravissimo catalogue was worth a second glance, and promply sat down in the dining room drawing deep breaths and stating whoo hoo with every turn of the page. I was slightly mortified and was about to take it away from him until he pointed at a particularly slim, good looking model and stated very clearly that it was me (my mummy). At this point I decided it was all a bit harmless really. Carry on at will....

Dog Poo

Dark Angel played a blinder today. I had an appointment to view a nursery. Whilst rushing to the car I must have stepped in some dog poo. I only realised this as I had been driving for about 5 mins. At first I kept blaming the aircon system for the stench in the car. Upon realising the unwelcome mess in my car, I pull over, get out I tried to wipe it off on the grass verge. I think I got it all.

Pull upto nursery, just as the woman answrs the door I realise I still have a load on my shoe. The woman must have thought I was slightly nuts as after shaking her hand I bend down to take my shoe off. She did not hear me explain why, as there was too much backgound noise. So there I am inspecting a nursery in bare feet. I wont mention the fact that by the end of the visit I had mashed banana with a generous sprinkling of glitter.

If I ever find the dog owner responsible, I will force them to clean MLP up after a raisin and spinach fest. Put your beloved pooches poo in a plastic bag, dog owners or I will find you!

How to organise a party for someone who hates parties

Well, it was always going to be a hard challenge. Its my grannies 80th birthday and my aunt and I are going to organise a gathering of family and close friends. We reckon that there will probably be about 40 of us. I am tasked next weekend with getting her moby and ringing her friends to tell them of our plan.

Whilst this is achiveable, the catering is going to be a hard nut to crack. My granny is even more fastidious about her food than I am. She has for her whole life not liked eating out, as she hates knowing she could have cooked something better at home. Oh yeah, she is also a puritan in terms of knowing where her food was sourced(thats where I interit it from!).

My plan is simple, give her enough champers and she will quite happily go large at McDonalds.........

Nah, in all seriousness, she will love whatever we organise. She will have no choice.

Free stuff for the kids

Evas giggly blog entry about free stuff got me thinking about the places I take the kids. Garden centres are my ultra fav thing, and have been for a few months. I know of at least five garden centres I can take them to within 15 mins drive. They are perfect as they invariably have pets, lots of plants and herbs to show the boy. Some have climbing frames and playhouses to test. It got even better about two weeks ago when they started taking the Crimbo merchanside out. We had a field day then. Boy was entertained for about 20 mins (which is a long time for a 2.75 year old) choosing his fav Crimbo tree. MLP just likes the book section, I just get her to exmine the books.

Last week we beat our own record, I managed to stay in garden centre for a full hour before kids started getting really tetchy. I have a stragegy. I check the name of the most expensive playhouse / climbing frame / Christmas tree and when kids fractiousness is reaching fever pitch, I gather them up, usher them out of the centre. I ensure that as we go past the tills I tell the boy very loudly "WE WILL OFCOURSE BRING DADDY BACK TO BUY THE HEIDI PLAYHOUSE / JUNGLEGYM / MIDAS TREE". I then smile at the cashier, look at the two kids, roll my eyes.

I then make sure that I do not go back to that garden centre again for a few weeks. Each week we try a new garden centre. If my rotation works out right, by the time we go back the rabbits wont quiver when they see MLP!

The birthday party

We had a great time at Mia's party. I think it was a little too good as I realise we wont just get away with food and party games for the boys third birthday. We may actually have to splash some cash and get a real entertainer in. Unfortunately neither of us can morph balloons into Peppa Pig or Thomas the Tank Engine. Neither of us can whip a rabbit out of a hat (I would try the chincilla, but he has already suffered enough from the two kids).

Then we got thinking as MLP did not have a party last year, she will need an extra special one next year. Hmmm. Definately food for thought.

Some of the best bits of being a parent

its not just about the laughing till you want to cry, not just the cuddles and kisses you get from the kids, something more than clapping in delight at their achievements, better than snuggling up and reading a book, more delicious than eating a plate of icecream with your kid. Its something that happens three times a year. Post Haloween is one of them, Dec 5 and also post Crimbo are delightful times. I am talking ofcourse about the choc fest that follows each of these holidays (December 5th is Santa visit night in hungary, where good kids get chocolates and bad kids get twigs).

I can safetly say that I look foward to such events with full glee, knowing that when the little monsters are in bed, it will be the culinary equivalent of the salmon coming home to spawn.

Tonight I have consumed approximately 1000 calories, I know this only because each mini twix and mars bar helpfuly displayed its calorific content like a badge of honour.

I dont discriminate, be it Mars, Twix, maltesers, all very welcome. I would feel less guilty if I know I did not need to polish off the goody bags from Mia's party tomorrow. I now have empathy with the black bear, but, unfortunately I dont get to hibernate following my feasts.

Ye Olde Fashioned Vomit Bug

I finished cleaning at 9pm, ready to be absorbed by a new book, when I hear retching from downstairs. The boy is projectile vomiting in his semi sleep. At first its only the bedclothes which are covered. Boy is inconsolable. Then I get covered. The hallway is runby covered as I run to the toilet with him. When we emerge, a half hour and full stomach contents later, I notice my new Milanese boots are drenched in vomit. The poor boy is a one man vomit machine for the rest of the night. I take him to our bed, cue 3 changes of sheets later at 2am, I admit defeat. I reach for my glasses and notice that these ended up in the sick bucket. As I head downstairs with the boy I dont know whether I am disorientated from lack of sleep, or whether its just from the coating of sick on my galsses. Poor boy continues to throw up every half hour, or whenever he moves, whichever is sooner. He manages 45 mins sleep cuddled upto me (the best part of the night!). At 5am he is bored of me reading and singing (who would not be?), so I abandon all principles and we watch some junk tv. Boy much better. Milanese boots dont have a good prognosis, one is beautiful and unscathed, the other horribly scarred, its not shiny and looks old. Vomit is very scary stuff.

They have infiltrated the car...

I always thought that the car was the last bastion of child free living (save for the car seats). Alas, this has now been infiltrated by Child Friendly CD (CFC). the kiddies happily sing along to Postman Pat and Going to the zoo, for hours on end. In the midst of me animating with one hand, along to the CD, singing, i have to get us to our chosen direction. As I severely resent having to sing Postman Pat more than 7 times in sucession, occasionally i change the lyrics. So far in my mind Postman Pat has been a homicidal maniac, Jackie O and then sometime he is a lumberjack (and he is ok!).

Summary again

Its still a bit manic in the household due to lack of nursery. Some noteable highlights this week include the boy answering the phone and saying "my munny doing a wee wee"! The boy at a birthday party bash, face down to the table desperately trying to gnaw off some leftover chocolate sauce which had dried onto the table.

MLP however is a tad more civilised, she just shakes her head and says "nem" - no!

Not much happening, have now found a nursery which both can go to, so things might have a change of being near normal soon!