How to colour your hair red.

1. Notice that my roots have used subterfuge to overtake my otherwise perfect (ofcourse!) head of hair.

2. Quick glance at social diary reveals no gaps to allow visit by the hairdresser.

3. Make mistake of taking the boy with you to a chemist.

4. Hurriedly try to choose hair colour whilst boy rearranges the womens toiletries aisle.

5. Put hair colour down, run over to boy who has tasked now himself with single-handedly destroying the electric toothbrush section .

6. Retrieve box of hair colour.

7. Pay for hair colour and try to prize the boys hands off the chocolate which is very helpfully located at the till.

8. Get home. Notice that the hair colour is not boring brown as I originally selected, but awful auburn.

9. Consider testing the colour on the boy as he sleeps.

10. Decide that 2009 is the year of living dangerously, so, slap on the colour.

11. Emerge from bathroom with moronic maroon hair, muttering obscenities whilst searching for hairdressers number.